This Week's Quote

"When you look back on a lifetime and think of what has been given to the world by your presence, your fugitive presence, inevitably you think of your art, whatever it may be, as the gift you have made to the world in acknowledgement of the gift you have been given, which is the life itself...That work is not an expression of the desire for praise or recognition, or prizes, but the deepest manifestation of your gratiturde for the gift of life." - Stanley Kunitz

What Would You Do If You Weren't Afraid?

I arrived back in Canberra last night. Somehow it feels different to the other times I’ve come home and yet in some ways similar. When I came home from Africa I was grateful to feel safe and to be living in a place where things were reliable like buses and trains. But I couldn't keep doing what I was doing so I moved to Canberra. When I came home from Nepal I was grateful to be clean again and for hot showers but I couldn’t go back to IT contracting and ended up doing corporate coaching which I loved.

This time it’s different. This time, for some reason not apparent to me yet, I’m not really grateful for anything. I didn’t want to come back, not yet anyway. Now, I want to stay "expanded" and not shrink back to the way I was before I left. Does that make sense? In that expanded state I feel powerful, confident, gorgeous and sexy! I feel more like a woman than a girl; self assured and strong. What is it about the trip that made me feel that way and how can I keep that feeling alive? Is it simply a matter of being true to myself? Is it being bold and courageous, taking risks and saying “Yes” to life? And if it is, how can I do that here, back in ‘normal land’ where I have debts to pay and a job to find?

I have 2 job interviews next week. Both are well paid and involve travel. Both are in Sydney. Both of them I am well qualified for. But if I am being true to myself will I take either of them? And if I don’t what else would I do? My commitment is to be true to myself, to let who I am, really, at my core, guide my choices but you know, I’m still not sure how that looks exactly.

I’ve just had a huge taste of it recently and I like it but I don’t yet know how to be that way every day. I don’t know how to choose a partner from that space. I don’t know how to choose a job or career or a place to live even. Or maybe I do and I’m just too chicken shit to follow through. For example I know I’m an adventurous free spirit who loves being a global citizen and that trying to build businesses in out of the way places like Canberra, Australia, which take time and money, which keep me tied to one location and which involve a lot of responsibility doesn’t really work for me. But I keep doing it. Perhaps, if I recognised and fully owned who I am, then I'd study journalism and psychology, find some writing contracts and sail around the world writing about people, photographing, diving, meeting the natives. Maybe someone or some organisation will fund me or maybe I'll fall in love with some gorgeous man who will provide me with financial support.

Am I dreaming or what? What would you do if you weren't afraid? What would you do if anything was possible?

So... some things to ponder...Isn’t journaling great?

Comment if you feel like it.
Love
B

The Adventure Continues...

...but not how I thought it would. Moxie, the 46' trimaran is still at it's mooring in Ko Olina marina, Jules and Louis have gone to Texas, Ian (our 4th team member and dive instructor) has accepted an invitation to join Jerry back on his boat and I've headed back home. Bummer :(

I decided not to accept Louis' invitation to join him and his family in Texas for Christmas. I decided not to accept Jerry's invitation to come back on board to keep the other female company (sharing the V birth, the only room left besides Jerry's bed, with another woman is not my idea of fun).

I decided to come home.

I am at Anita's and Paul's in Sydney, about to head to Canberra to face the things I need to face, incompletions and unfinished business, things that tie me down and don't add much to my life, like debt.

It is no accident, what has happened to me. I realise now that I was resisting things, running away from something. Coming back reflects a readiness and willingness on my part to stop running. Not sure what that looks like or how I'm going to do it. I'm terrified of monotony and boredom and sameness. I love being different and I've vehemently resisted anyone or anything taking away my freedom. But there seem to be limitations on this now. Now it just feels like resisting responsibility and avoiding intimacy. I'm feeling my age. I'm tired of flitting from one thing to the next but the alternative seems so onerous that I can't stand the thought of it. Yet, nothing in the database of my mind knows how to deal with this anymore, or grow beyond it. I feel like I've tried everything to settle down and be responsible and do the right thing, find a man, get married, save and invest for my retirement, work in the public service...

Now that I have no home, no job, no boyfriend and no cat, I'm looking into the future and I've never been so unsure of what's next. One of the biggest things I've learned in the last few weeks is that my criteria for decision making is a shaky foundation of wants and needs and don't wants and feelings and emotions. Nothing solid to guide my choices. Perhaps it's a spiritual quest I'm on and I'm looking for guidance from something substantial. It isn't my feelings because they change every week. It isn't my wants because I want everything, sometimes all at once. I've never felt so existentially confused. Yet at the same time I am excited. The future is a blank canvas and I can create whatever I want.

I loved my time in Hawaii. I love the Americans and the permission they give you to be yourself. So much more than we Aussies do. I met some wonderful people living lives of diversity and adventure. I met some wonderful men and my time with them was beautiful. I felt alive and free and naturally confident on my travels, despite the trials and tribulations.

I discovered the adventure of the sea, though I didn't get to experience much of it. It's a whole new universe that totally excites me. It's the invitation to learn to dive and discover (and photograph) the underwater universe; the opportunity to commune with native communities to be part of something ancient for just a little while; it's living in close quarters with other human beings where you can't run away and where you have to face yourself and who you are; it's bobbing up and down in an enormous ocean realising how small and insignificant you and your life are and letting this perspective inform your life, rather than the one of relentless pursuit and unconscious driven-ness that most of us experience.

Something great has got to be born from all this experience. It can't be for nothing. Where's the clarity, where's the point? The next few weeks may be as interesting as the last few. We shall see. Stay tuned.

Adventures in Coffee

One of the things I love about travelling is discovering the different way people do things. Like coffee for example. You get used to the way things are done at home and you think that it's like that every where you go but not true. Even for me who drinks her coffee black. They don't have "long black". So at first I ordered expresso but I'd get a tablespoon of coffee in a styrofoam cup. Then I ordered a double shot and they'd yell out doppio or something like that and I'd be standing there looking off into the distance with no idea that that was what I'd ordered. Eventually I just asked for a black coffee and it didn't bother me whether it came out of a cappacino machine or the drip coffee machine. It pretty much tasted the same.
Jules who has milk in her coffee had even bigger adventures. She wanted a cappacino with soy milk but the soy they use everywhere is super sweet, vanilla flavoured soy and it's like drinking syrup. So she'd ask for a latte with normal milk but it was so weak it was awful. Then she asked for a cappacino without foam but they didn't "get" it so it came with half a cup of foam and still too weak. Eventually she asked for a double shot cappacino with no foam and she got something close to what she wanted. Hilarious.

Dessert to Die For

After a long day Jules, Louis and I discovered the Harbour Pub and the Chart House Restaurant and we decided to have Happy Hour there. Just about everyone in Hawaii, it seems, knows about the Harbour Pub. After we'd had our $4.50 nachos I was scanning the menu and discovered Chocolate Lava Cake. Well!! I had discovered Chocolate Lava Cake when I was in Bhutan. The women from Hong Kong and Singapore in our group already knew about it and they said I just had to try it. And try it I did. It was sensational! I've never seen it since till I discovered it on that menu and of course, we just had to have it. One serve was enough for all 3 of us. To my delight it was even better than I had remembered it - warm, chocolate cake on the outside and rich, runny chocolate pudding on the inside. So good it deserves its own entry in the Blog!

Billy Graham to the Rescue!

I was having a miserable day a few days ago so I took myself to Waimea Bay beach to walk it off. I shed a few tears, went for a swim and allowed myself to indulge in feeling thoroughly sorry for myself for a little while. I watched people play in the water. One guy was loving it so much you couldn't get him out. Eventually, in a lovely scene of role reversal, I heard his little son yell out "Dad, it's time to go home!" It was funny.

I also watched some strapping, young dudes with shovels build a channel between the lagoon and the beach. After a few hours their group had grown from 4 or 5 to a dozen. I noticed the next day that they'd been successful and that the whole landscape of that part of the beach had changed.

As I was about to leave the beach a lady on a nearby towel started talking to me. Eventually she walked over and we chatted for a while. Just small talk. Then she handed me a little flyer which I noticed had "Billy Graham" all over the front of it. She must have picked up on how I was feeling and decided to make a connection. Though I'm not particularly religious I found the gesture to be really sweet. I felt much better after that.

Angel of God

As you know we’ve been holed up in a cheap and nasty backpackers on the North Shore of Oahu. We’ve done a little shopping, sightseeing and other touristy things and we’re all thoroughly over it already. None of us would classify ourselves as tourists. And it’s so expensive! Only come here, travelers, if you’re a surfy dude, at least at winter-time.

However, that’s not to say that we haven’t had a good time. Riccardo’s BBQs and mid morning internet at the Shark Cove grill have been fun and a great way to get to know people. Jules and I have done a long walk each morning though for some reason we’ve never done any yoga (for Jules) or martial arts (for me), like we said we would.

A highlight of one of the days was meeting Daniel. Daniel we’re not sure how to classify; beach bum, angel from God, itinerant, nature lover, coffee lover. Anyway he dropped in on us one morning as we were having coffee outside our room, overlooking the beach. We invited him to share our coffee but all he wanted was hot water because, like all good coffee connoisseurs, he wanted to make it the way he liked it, which was, instant vanilla flavoured Columbian coffee with creamer or CoffeeMate as you may know it. Disgusting stuff that creamer but the Americans seem to love it.

Anyway, Daniel was full of surprises. He was very talkative and though a little scattered in his thinking he was lucid and actually very wise. He asked lots of questions like how old are you and are you married! He even asked me if I’d marry him, though when I told him I was 26 (I’m not) he told me I was too old for him and that he was looking for someone between 19 and 25! All very tongue in cheek of course. But my first marriage proposal in a while.

We were lucky he came along because we were looking for some guidance as to how our adventure might continue. Jules particularly. Daniel did carry a beautiful Bible around with him and as we were waxing philosophical or perhaps spiritual, he took it upon himself to quote a few passages. For me it was Isiah, 51 I think. Something about believing in myself and performance. Truthfully, like most of the Bible I didn’t really understand any of it. But I did get the essence of it. Daniel’s message to us was to have faith, believe in what’s possible and to continue to take right action. Ahhh, so simple, but not always easy, eh?

Surf's Up - Surfing Competition

Brazilian Encounters

Wow, what a week. Riccardo, the lovely Brazilian who organises the BBQs at the Backpackers, has entertained us with lively feasts involving Brazilian beans, chicken and beef burritos, Hawaiian chicken, vegie and beef burgers and more. We've been meeting the other residents there, finding out about what's on and the weather and so on. These photos are from Burrito Night where Louis brought a bottle of rum and a bottle of coke and we all got very merry! Our table had 2 Texans, 2 Aussies, a Brazilian, a German and an English woman. It's so fabulous to meet and have a conversation with people from all around the world.

Still no boat on the Horizon

We've hired a car and driven up to the North Shore of Oahu. They have surfing competitions here on pipeline waves (photos to come), massive waves, rough water and lots of surfy dudes about the place. Though it's a good place for us to regroup and create a new plan.
I'm taking some time for reflection to review my options and choices. There's something spiritual about being here and the adventures it invites - a tantalising taste of something familiar and right. I'm not exactly sure what it is but I expect to find out.
In the mean time Louis is working hard to find us a boat looking for a crew that we can join. I reckon we'll have something by the end of this week.

Change of Location

Today we left Ko Olina marina and caught the bus into Honolulu to stay with a friend of a friend. Carol and Greg are fabulously generous to put us (all four of us) up for a couple of nights. In the meantime we'll be looking for somewhere more permanent to stay and continuing to work on getting ourselves our next boat. We have letters to write, emails to send, phone calls to make to put our fundraising into action. And we need to negotiate for the boat. A big working day tomorrow.
We have hired a car though and we'll be wizzing around the place a bit doing jobs, buying some food and so on. Hopefully the next day we'll have most things in order and we'll be able to take a day off and visit some places on the island.
A flat day today. Nearly all day riding buses. Heading off to bed so we can start afresh tomorrow.

Indiana Jones!

The game has changed. We came here to crew on someone else's yacht, sail the Pacific, learn to dive, go fishing and visit island communities. What's occurred is that a team has formed and we've clicked! New possibilities have opened up, opportunities that we never expected. Opportunities for us all to live our dreams. Jerry has been a wonderful catalyst for bringing us together and showing us that we need to go for our dreams. But we're being thrown all kinds of challenges...

Indiana Jones and his Temple of Doom is our metaphor for our journey at the moment. We are on an adventure but we're being hit by obstacles - rolling boulders, hot metal spikes, fire and brimstone!

We're homeless, camping out in someone else's boat but only till tomorrow. The Harbour Master wants us out (we're not sure why). We've found a boat at the marina, a 47 foot trimaran, that would be fabulous for what we want to do but we need to come up with the money to pay for it. We all have a dream to sail the Pacific, inviting other adventurers to travel with us, to learn sailing and diving and deliver projects to remote island communities but each of us needs to earn an income as we do it. We see sciencists, researchers, engineers and other generous human beings wanting to use their skills to benefit others, joining us on the boat but we need a boat!!! Dilemmas, dilemmas.

Excitingly, we've found a boat called Moxie (which according to Webster's English dictionary means Energy, Pep, Courage, Determination and Know-how!!) and she's been for sale for almost 2 years. We've had a conversation with the owner who is keen to sell it to us. Tomorrow we may make an offer.

Some Time Out

Despite the drama of the previous day we decide to say yes to an invitation by Clint (far right in photo) to go sailing and snorkelling. Clint is a resident in the marina, a US Navy diver and an excellent sailor. We set off around 9.30 and sail under the wind for half an hour to a site just off shore from a power plant. A hot water pipe outlet 100m off shore attract a whole lot of coral and exotic looking fish. We jump in with our snorkel and fins and play with the fishes for a while. I loved it. I'm enchanted by this underwater world and can't wait to learn how to scuba dive and photograph underwater.

We sail back to shore and remember the predicament we're in and that we need to take some action to sort things out. We head off to the hotel for a late lunch and antoher team meeting. the second in 2 days! This time it's to discuss our options and create an action plan.

WHAT THE HECK ARE WE GOING TO DO NOW?

Fateful Day

Day 8 A Change in Course.
Louis and Jules argued this morning and it was an ominous sign. Little did we know what would come about by the end of the day. Early this morning we were walking on Waikiki beach. Jules was upset and angry because Louis was upset and angry and I was in the middle of all this tension and upset. Ian was sleeping off a big night and Jerry (the owner) was worrying about his computer and internet access, oblivious to the whole thing.

Eventually Jerry wnet off to have lunch, organise a golf match and buy a computer and the rest of us called a team meeting. There was distance between us and Jerry, particularly Louis and Jerry and we were sick of it. We needed a new way to deal with it. Firstly we had to work out what the problem was. Basically, none of us were having any fun. Real fun - connecting, learning, feeling part of a team. Jerry would say one thing and do another so we were left confused, uncertain, mistrusting and separate. And to be honest, leaderless.
As a team we all decided it couldn't continue. We all agreed that our big picture goal is to have FUN and if it ain't fun, we're not doing it. WEll, we're not having any fun. The tension is killing it. But what do we do about it. We explore heaps of options and come up with only logical, obvious one and that is to leave the boat. We decide to jump ship, leave, adios. NOW!
Well, we jump into action. Within half an hour we're all packed and within another half an hour we're waiting by the front gate of the yacht club waiting for a taxi to take us back to Ko Olina marina where a recent new aquaintance (and angel, thankyou Kevin) has allowed us to crash on his boat for a while.
We arrive at the marina exhilarated but not really present to the enormity of what we've done. We're clear though, that we make a great team, that we still want to make the crossing to Singapore, and that we want to do it on our own terms. But we're not clear how we're going to do that.
But then there is Moxie!

Thanksgiving

Well, Thanksgiving may have delayed our preparations but this afternoon we had one fabulous meal. Despite having just recovered from seasickness, I said yes to a Thanksgiving Pot luck buffet dinner at 4.30pm.

Well, what an impressive spread. Turkey baked and turkey fried and turkey smoked, stuffing, salads, cranberry sauce and jelly, corn bread, pasta, beans, mashed potato, gravy, and more. Then there was dessert - so many types of pumpkin pie, pumpkin cheesecake, oreo icecream cake, cream pies, several types of apple pie and cherry pie. As is the American habit everything, including the vegetables and the salad, was sweet.

It was held in the Hawaiian Yacht Club room and there were probably 120 people there (most of them pretty ancient I have to say!). We ate as the sun set and the full moon shone, wondering what the poor people were doing today though not for long. Afterwards Ian and I were taken to pick up some fresh fish from the fishing boats a few bays away. We got fresh Mahi Mahi and some yellowfin tuna for sashimi. Wow, what a food day!

Motoring to a new destination

Day 7. Today we motored from Ko Olina marina to the Hawaii Yacht Club marina right next to the famous Waikiki Beach.

The ride in the boat was about 4 hours long and pretty uneventful except that with plenty of diesel fumes and having to go below deck to pee, I managed to get fairly decently sea sick! I sat quietly leaning against the mast and looked at the horizon as instructed by Louis but I still felt waves of nausea and broke out in a sweat. Then I start to yawn and feel an overwhelming drowsiness. Jules yelled out "OMG, she's gone yellow!" and I gave a brave but weak smile and said I was alright. What I was really thinking was "Thank Goodness, we're gettig close to shore and moving into calmer waters. but Holy Shit what am I going to be like when we have 12 solid days of sailing out at sea on our way to the Marshall Islands. I can easily imagine myself wanting to throw myself over the side just to end the revolting feeling of being sick. All I can say is thank goodness for drugs. And every cloud has a silver lining. Maybe I'll trim down a few kilos!!

On our way to the Hawaii Yacht Club.

Louis and Ian taking a dive.

The Team sans our fearless leader

Reading

Preparations have slowed down as some major cleaning of the hull needs to be done and we're going to have to join the queue for getting that done. In the mean time we've done some internal cleaning, got the shopping list together, got the medicine list together. Even so, there's not that much to do now so I've taken myself off to beach to read my book and watch the Japanese get their wedding photos taken.

The Team is Complete

A full day of working to prepare the boat yesterday and things are going pretty well. We're in the "Storming" stage of team building and to be honest, there have been a few tense moments. For example when the owner says he's going to do something and it's different to what was originally communicated or to what we think is better then hackles rise and reactions occur. As someone who runs away from conflict I find the confined spaces and the inability to just take off pretty confronting. But I reckon that's one of the things I'm here to learn. I'm so used to being on my own, living by myself, working for myself so having to share and deal with shit and communicate what I need is bloody good for me.

Day Off

Today was a day off, especially for Jules and Louis who have been working like beavers all week. Jules hired a car and we visited an organic, healthy food shop in Pearl City (near the famous Pearl Harbour).

After that, we went into Honolulu to Chinatown where they had yummy Asian style Hawaiian food, bought tropical fruit like papaya and lychees and where we visited bead shops and stuck our noses into Chinese herbalist and acupuncture places - mostly so I could see how the traditional medicine thing works in Hawaii. To be honest you probably could have been in any Chinatown in the world!

Next we hopped in the car and drove along the famous Waikiki beach. It was FULL of tourists and looked very much like a Queensland Gold Coast on steroids. We kept on driving and went up to Diamond Head, a volcanic crater that you can walk to the top of. It gave a spectacular view of all of the island of Oahu.

We sped home (Louis was driving!) back to the marina where we went for a swim then had dinner at a fancy Japanese restaurant...half price sushi special from 5.30 - 6.30.

A great day. We have met some fantastic people, mostly others in the marina, like the 2 Californians, sort of retired, who sailed here from America leaving their wives and kids behind. They left us a stack of their supplies as they're about to fly home. And the Navy guy that is bringing us some patches for travel sickness. Such lovely people with such wonderful generosity.

Day 3 in Hawaii

Well, Mum always says that the anticipation is better than the participation and of course she's right. But I only had 10 days to get everything ready and I don't think there was much space in my mind for anticipation. Anyway, yesterday was spent going through the food stocks to do an inventory. There was so much stuff there that our shopping list isn't going to be very huge.

Though...having said that, I have a taste for healthy, organic food and there are no chickpeas, rice crackers, tahini, rice milk, horseradish cream, organic dark chocolate, etc, etc in the pantry so we're going to have to add those to the list.

Jerry, the owner, is from Georgia and has a taste for chilli beef, fish chowder and other foods that both Jules and I wouldn't really eat in a pink fit. Though as the people responsible for the cooking we're going to have to be flexible with it all. Can't feed the men tofu and mung beans now can we!

Comments

Gosh, I'd love to hear from you too. Leave your comments below. No-one will read them I promise!!

Fluid Adventures

This whole adventure started with Louis asking me to join the crew on board SV Sugarcane. Louis loves to share the sea with people and is wonderful teacher.

Louis is the director of Fluid Adventures. The company's vision is to share the adventure and challenge of the sea with those people seeking a journey with a difference, in order to bring about a profound shift in how they relate to their life and the world.

Technically, Jules, Ian and I are the first customers for Fluid Adventures in it's current form. To find out more go to: www.fluidadventures.net

Photos

This is the yacht. The SV Sugarcane - 55' with all the modern conveniences, TV, DVD player. dehumidifier, radar, internet, breadmaker, surround sound music, entertainment system, 2 generators for electricity, 40 horse powered dinghy, desalination system, automatic washing machine and dryer, ice making machine... you name it, it's here.

My room, to be shared with Ian. Also has a couple of drawers and a small cupboard for hanging clothes. AND NOT MUCH ELSE! No room.


The heads (bathroom) of which there are 2 on the boat. Notice the lovely star spangled banner shower curtain! The little white bucket is for toilet paper as none is allowed down the dunny! The other 2 rooms on the boat have double beds, one for Jerry the Owner and one for Jules and Louis.

Words of Wisdom

The way you get meaning into your life is to devote yourself to loving others, devote yourself to your community around you and devote yourself to creating something that gives you purpose and meaning.

The most important thing in life is to learn how to give out love and to let it come in.

Tuesdays with Morrie by Mitch Albom

Arrived in Hawaii

OMG! I'm here. The last 10 days have been a whirl and here I am in Hawaii. My mind thinks I'm still back in Oz just visiting a mariner somewhere. That is until I notice that they walk on the right side of the path, the toilet bowls are full of water and the dude on the radio has an American accent! Then I say "Oh Yeah! I'M IN AMERICA!

I'm buggered. Haven't stopped to draw breath in 10 days and then an overnight flight and a full day of unpacking, helping clean and taking out garbage. I sure do hope I sleep well tonight.

So, where am I. I'm in the Ko Olina mariner. The sun is shining, it's warm and muggy (particularly compared to Canberra). The yacht is great, lots of wood paneling and floorboards. And lots of crap. Multiples of everything including 6 potato peelers. But Jules and Louis have done a grand job cleaning and tidying up. It's looking great. Tomorrow we'll go through the pantry and the medicine kit to take inventory, throw out old stuff and nut out a shopping list.

This afternoon we all get to meet the owner who's arriving from Georgia today. We'll have a "getting to know you" afternoon and do dinner somewhere nice. Sunday is our day off to see the sights, other than the insides of a boat, and check out Wakiki and a few other places.

Not sea sick yet, though we are moored in a very quiet, still bay. Next week when we're ready we'll push off towards the Marshall Islands. It will be 12 days of 24/7 sailing by wind or motor. So for 12 days we won't see land! No getting off. At the mercy of the sea and her vagaries. Holed up with 4 other people in a tiny space the size of the average living/dining room. Whoa! What a challenge.

My room is not much bigger than a broom closet on its side AND I'm sharing it with another human being, Ian, from Alaska. Ian arrives Sunday. I hope he doesn't snore or fart too loudly!

What the Heck are You Doing Brenda?

I don't have a photo of the yacht yet. I know it's about 20 years old and it hasn't been used much over the years. I know it's moored (is that how you spell that? - see how much I know about sailing!) in Hawaii, it's 55 feet and according to Jules and Louis, it's packed to the gunnels with STUFF.

The owner of the boat is a retired CEO from Georgia in America, called Jerry. The team consists of Jerry, of course, Louis, the Texan 50yrs, Jules from Sydney 54 yrs, me 41 yrs and another guy originally from Alaska but currently in Vietnam. He's a chef and a dive instructor and about 25 years old.

The route starts in the Hawaiian Islands. We then sail west to the Marshall Islands where we'll probably have Christmas.

Then it's other various islands one of which is called Guam, which alot of people have heard of. Next we reach the Phillipines. At some point I'll get off and come home while the rest will keep on going to Singapore.

My job will be to scrub the decks, clean toilets, cook ocassionally, learn to sail, stand watch, navigate and do all the other things that crew do that I don't even know about yet. But, I'll also be swimming, snorkelling, visiting communities on the islands, photographing and blogging. Hopefully I'll get to read a book or two, too. Oh, and I'll also be sick as a dog with seasickness!

So that's kind of it in a nutshell. At least that's what I think it is. Stay posted for the real story...

Pirate Party

It all started the weekend of the Pirate Party. To see some photos, go to

http://www.flickr.com/photos/8013336@N03/

Bubbles

Sunday 11th November: The house is packed up, bus and plane tickets have been bought, clients have been contacted. Still no new home for my cat though. I hope we find someone soon. I don't want to consider the options...

Time for bed. I'm exhausted.

MissAdventures!

Thursday was a relatively normal day, at least on the outside. On the inside I was buzzing. I'd walk from the dining room to the bathroom and by the time I got to there I'd forgotten what I went there for, so I'd have to go back to the dining room to remember.

Despite all this, I composed myself a fabulous TODO list and I just started to methodically work through it.

On top of organising the trip, I also had to move out of my house. It's about to be sold. So Friday I start sorting and culling and packing and chucking! Chucking things out that is. I should clarify given the association here with the sea!

The family rallied together and over the weekend we managed to move 90% of my stuff into storage. Moving house and letting go of all the things you don't want/need anymore is such an emotional process. Quite sad really. The "stuff" you collect says so much about you. I very happily gave up the books on how to be rich/successful/happy. Don't need them anymore.

Still, it's very liberating. I feel lighter.

Day 2

The day after the owner of SV Sugarcane agrees to let me crew on board his yacht, I'm still in Sydney, I've met with my coach, I've packed up the car and I'm heading back to Canberra. I'm so excited, apprehensive, totally enlivened and my head is starting to fill up with all the things I have to do in the next week: all the phone calls, the bills to prepay, the people to help me move, the gear I need to get, the conversations I'm going to have and so on. I've started a list and at 2 pages I'm starting to feel like I've got most of it covered!

Wednesday morning, I have a conversation about a new job, I resign from my pharmacy job, I tell my parents what I'm about to do and my adrenalin is pumping. I've been sleeping ok but waking up early and not getting back to sleep. I buy a ton of stuff at the pharmacy in preparation for my adventure: travelcalm, antinausea wrist bands, tampons, tiger balm, lip balm, sunscreen, leg wax...important things!

Wednesday night I start calling people to let them know. Everyone is excited. Everyone would love to be coming with me. Everyone is supportive. I love them. And it calms my nerves.

First Entry

Monday was the day (it's now Saturday). I was sitting there innocently enjoying a conversation with Louis, sharing that my future looked a little dull if not bleak, at least until March when business picked up again, when all of SUDDEN he said the words "Why don't you come with us? We need crew"

What he meant was: why don't you come with Julie and I to Hawaii to crew on board SV Sugarcane! I tried to think of a good reason to say no but couldn't think of anything. A few emails and several phone calls later I was in! The owner had agreed that despite being VERY green at sailing and even getting a little sea sick that I was alright to be part of the team.

What that meant for me was resigning from my part-time job, moving all my furniture into storage, rearranging my coaching clients, buying the ticket and the gear I needed, finalising the details of selling my investment unit and seeing the accountant. All in 10 days!

So here I am now, Day 5, and OMG what a week it's been.